no no i'm not engaged. a lot of others seem to be though. i guess it's that time in life. i'm not complaining or bitching about it, it's just a little crazy sometimes. i'm so happy for all of my friends. and i would do nothing to take away from any of their joy.
there are always those of us though, the stragglers. we're a little behind it seems. and there's something of a stigma to it. it's like going to college a little. those still in high school can't really understand what it is like to be in college, even though there might only be a year age difference--or in this case none at all, or even younger. i don't think it is a conscious thing mostly. but there is a sense of having reached the 'next level' or something like that.
be good to your single friends my coupled comrades!
i read some eldredge that really spoke to me today. as men there is a time in life when we are awakened to beauty, often by that beautiful woman who you see with those different eyes all of the sudden, or from the onset. but that romance must continue into our awakening to the Divine Romance, falling in love with God. knowing him as the lover of my soul, feeling my heart burn for the Lord. it is hard with the male image of God.
i know something of love now after this last year. sure i had read a lot about it before then and had family and friends. but after discovering a entirely new love, i think i am finally able to learn something of a new love for God. like a part of myself i am suddenly able to feel, as if only just now discovered, and in that there is something new to offer to my Lord. i want to.
maybe that's touching on the edge of that heightened experienced those soon to be married have come to know--not that you have to be engaged to come into that.
i believe one day i'll be there, at the brink of a new adventure in life, getting to ride the big kid rides. i'll just keep enjoying the wacky worm for now. (worlds of fun reference...anyone?)
ha. no it's not that bad. single life is a treasure of its own. kind of like being a pirate. it's cool to ride on the ship and have a peg leg and say cool things like "arrgh a mast ye maties!" but ultimately you're still after the gold, right? oh i have lots of thoughts on marriage--too touchy for a blog? maybe another time. ahoy!
as for me, i'm good for now. i'll stick with treasuring my adorable niece!