there is no time for the neighbors to come watch,
no, a fire like this burns in the slightest moment,
catching on the slightest click to ember and flame.
ashes in an instant,
there is no decision on what to grab on your way out.
ok so a poem about all of that is a little silly. and i didn't really want to write a full one anyway. i was pretty distraught last night, upset at all that i had lost. but then things became ok. i mean, it's just stuff right? everything burns. and really it is not all lost. or at least it is not all lost. the music i can get back from my ipod, even though i care about that the least. the pictures--a good deal of them are on one of my old computer, as were some of my stories thank goodness. i lost all my other writings for books or other things, old papers and conversations with friends and letters i'd written. those are the hardest for sure, but it's ok. would i ever have gone back and read them all? maybe, but they do not make up my memories or really give value to those relationships and such. i took in my external to technical services so perhaps they can get some of it back. we'll see.
no there is almost something kind of freeing in it, in this loss. this stuff doesn't have that big of a hold on me. it is just stuff. of course it's easier to say all that since i'm not really losing everything, and i still have the physical stuff like my computer and such. it would be something to really lose it all, or to give it all up. so, in that light, and in the spirit of this not so great experience i will leave you with one of the few songs i still have. and i'm off to nebraska tomorrow to visit friends. i'm looking forward to a good little trip.